I have started liking these random posts….perfect way to put down the many thoughts floating around in my mind, when I feel too lazy to write a full post. 😛 So here I go again – (more…)
When he married her she was very young and he had a decent job. Both were not even graduates. Within 9 years of marriage they had 3 daughters. Birth of daughters, and when it’s three of them, is often a topic of discussion, sometimes pity & sometime ridicule too. But they accepted their gifts from God with gratefulness & listened to their hearts. Never did any of them ever regret that they were girls & carried out their responsibilities to the best of their abilities. And both of them had one common dream for the three of them – to educate them well & also to bring them up to be good human-beings. (more…)
I remember that tinkling & jingling sound…..I miss it too! It was a typical sound synonymous with her.
As a kid it was the “beware” signal for the three of us, if we were up to some mischief, as well as the comforting signal that she is there when we needed her. In short, it was our secret signal to know her whereabouts. 🙂
I remember this sound of hers reverberating in our home.
And now, miles away from home, I feel deprived of that oh-so-familiar sound. But when I hear it once in a while, it seems to be the best music for me- one that soothes me & my soul. (more…)
“The table is one of the most intimate places in our lives. It is there that we give ourselves to one another. When we say, ‘Take some more, let me serve you another plate, let me pour you another glass, don’t be shy, enjoy it,’ we say a lot more than words express. We invite our friends to become part of our lives. We want them to be nurtured by the same food and drink that nurture us. We desire communion. Every breakfast, lunch, or dinner can become a time of growing communication with one another.” ~ Henri Nouwan, Bread for the Journey
Food is something I love…a lot. No matter how high a particular dish counts in the calorie scale I will still eat it if I love it. At the best I can moderate the amounts I gulp in…but that is all I can do in the name of healthy eating. 😛
The very word – food – evokes passionate emotions in me. How can you turn your face away, from perfectly barbecued chicken pieces / kebabs, the delicious oils dripping of all its goodness, especially on a cold, foggy winter night? How can you say no to a platter of lentil or onion fritters with a cup of tea on a wet, monsoon evening? How can you say no to a tall, chilled glass of lemonade when you come home from shopping one summer day? Naah! I cannot. (more…)
When I saw this photo as the Write Tribe Wednesday Prompt (27 Nov- 04 Dec, 2013), the first thing that instantly came to my mind was this Sanskrit sloka which my Maa had taught me and my sisters when we were kids.
Om Asato Maa Sad-Gamaya |
Tamaso Maa Jyotir-Gamaya |
Mrtyor-Maa Amrtam Gamaya |
Om Shaantih Shaantih Shaantih || (more…)
Anai – this was what we called our maternal grandma. The word brings both a tear in my eyes and a smile on my face, as the memories I had with her rushes down to my mind. We never got to meet our paternal grandma so the love of a grandmother meant the love of our Anai. We loved her. We adored her. She was a darling. Whenever I think of her I never seem to have any bitter memories with her. All that I remember is good and happy about her. Anyone and everyone who knew her would agree with me on this without a second thought.
In the cookies of Life – grandmothers are the chocolate chips! ~ Anonymous
She was nothing extraordinary yet she was great in her ordinary ways. She was a very simple woman but with very clear thoughts, way beyond her generation. Many a times she had awed us with her foresightedness and also contemporary thinking, which is not much seen in her generation.
She was elegant, original and really loved her family. I remember her telling us the stories of her marriage. She was a darling of her brothers and brought up with great love. On the day of her marriage, when she was on her way to the interior village my Putha belonged to, she was sad that she would now be cut off from the outside world. But she took everything in her own stride and embraced her new life with all its challenges with a brave and calm face. She became the perfect wife/mother/daughter-in-law taking care of the household and the kids & her father-in-law, all alone, because Putha (Grandpa) worked in the (then) distant hills of Arunachal Pradesh. He could come down only twice a year as the means of communication those days was not very good. And they did not even have telephone in those days! In spite of all the odds, Anai successfully brought up her 5 daughters and 1 son into good and responsible individuals.
Anai hadn’t even finished high school, but she could read and write well. Being not able to have higher education for herself she insisted her daughters to go for higher education and taught them about the independence that it brought along. The same had been handed to us by our Maa. Anai believed that being girls, they have to learn household chores but education was important too. Her father-in-law helped her in this endeavour of hers. She encouraged all her daughters to leave home in the pursuit of higher education. Even in her old age, Anai preferred reading books/articles which enhanced her knowledge in some or the other way. She believed that there is always something or the other one can always learn about from the written word. We were quite amazed when she even tried a recipe or two from the Assamese magazines she read!
Anai was always a busy woman. She loved to be busy – doing something or the other. She had a routine which she followed very diligently. She hated it when we lazed around doing nothing. For her, keeping oneself busy was healthy for both the body and the mind. She was a neat and clean lady. Her house was spotless, so were her curtains, bed sheets and her own clothes. People used to comment on her pristine white based mekhela-chadors (traditional 2 piece Assamese sari) which were always sparkling. And age never changed this.
She was a darling and a fun person to be with. Everyone who came in contact with her could not escape her infectious sense of humour. Whenever she visited us, there will always be a steady flow of neighbors dropping by to say hello to her and invite her for a cup of tea at their home. She made us laugh and literally roll on the floor during all the time she spent with us. But this did not mean that she would spoil us. She made us understand the fine balance between one’s work and fun and that we should have a mix of both.
A grandmother is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend. ~ Author Unknown
Like all other grandmas, Anai too insisted us to have healthy food in our diet. She would tell us about the health benefits of different fruit and vegetables and never failed to mention where she had read about it, in case we did not believe her. On our visits to meet her, she made us eat every 3-4 hours. I and my sisters liked our fishes to be fried crisply but she insisted that we should have it fried in less oil because it was healthy. Also, she said that the peels of the vegetable should be only slightly removed with some of the greenish portion retained because according to her that’s where the vitamins were! And then there were the green leafy vegetable curry with ‘slightly’ fried fish with every meal. How we laughed at her stories she cooked up to convince us to eat the healthy stuff!
Today, as I put down my thoughts & memories about Anai, I once again realize what she meant to me and my sisters. As kids, we could not comprehend or fully realize the meaning of her actions and her love. We might have failed to notice how wise she was, how much patience she had, or how much guidance she gave us by her example and by her helpful caring ways. Years go by before we know and understand the depth of all these things. It’s these and many other things that make me realize how lucky I and my sisters were to have this amazing woman – our Anai – our grandmother – as the centered root of strength and love in our life. I miss her so much.
I dedicate this post to my loving and fun Anai and I would like to bow down and say Thank You to her – for everything she had done for us and for every lesson she taught us. I pray that she continues to love us, bless us, guide us and always keep an eye on us from the heavens above. Amen.
Grandmas are for stories about things of long ago….
Grandmas are for caring about all the things you know…
Grandmas are for rocking you and singing you to sleep.
Grandmas are for giving you nice memories to keep…
Grandmas are for knowing all the things you’re dreaming of…
But, most importantly of all, Grandmas are for love.
~ Author Unknown ~
“A father is someone that
Holds your hand at the fair
Makes sure you do what your mother says
Holds back your hair when you are sick
Brushes that hair when it is tangled because mother is too busy
Lets you eat ice cream for breakfast
But only when mother is away.
He walks you down the aisle
And tells u everything is gonna be Ok!”
A few days back, I watched the movie Father of the Bride (1991) once again. 😀 It is one of my all time favorite movies. The sweet bond between a father and his daughter is shown here in a perfect way, at least for me. They say, from the instant he lays eyes on her, he adores his daughter. Whoever she grows up to be, she is always that little girl in pigtails to him….. daddy’s lil’ girl. 🙂
When a child is born, a father is born. A mother is born, too of course, but at least for her it’s a gradual process. Body and soul, she has nine months to get used to what’s happening. She becomes what’s happening. But for even the best-prepared father, it happens all at once. On the other side of a plate-glass window, a nurse is holding up something roughly the size of a loaf of bread for him to see for the first time.
– Frederick Buechner in Whistling in the Dark
My Deuta (Dad) is a quiet man. He prefers to carry out his duties silently and all by himself, to the extent possible. He loves helping and cares for others, especially us and our extended family. Even though he never says it aloud, we know that he expects the same kind of care and love. Raising 3 daughters and giving them Convent (expensive) education, in the meager salary of a state government employee had never been easy for him, marriages and other festivities aside. But he never failed us. He used to tell us, “You cannot expect everything to be at your foot the moment you ask for it. You have to wait and you might as well get it”. This has made us value things we get and that everything, be it a piece of new eraser or a pair of new shoes, has a value. He always gave us practical lessons on life and always taught us the importance of family ties. From our early days of childhood, he made it clear to us that he cannot run around for every small thing for each one of us and so we should learn to do most of our work ourselves. When many of our friends used to be dropped at tuition classes, etc. by their dads or moms, I and my sisters rode cycles. Those were his early lessons on life and on being independent women. And this is helping me today to face the big bad world with courage & confidence.
Deuta has limitless faith in God and believes in Karma, that what goes around comes around. Even during our hard times, he never lost his faith on the Almighty. For him, every problem has a solution.
In our family, we do not indulge in openly displaying our affection towards each other. But now, with an empty nest, things have changed for both Maa and Deuta. Deuta does not talk much to us over phone, except the important things. But then he pesters Maa to call us if we don’t call them. 😛 Normally it’s the mothers who take up the job of worrying, but in our case it is our Deuta as well!!
I remember those days when Maa used to be not home, either visiting someone at our ancestral home or her own parents. Those were our days of indulgence. Deuta used to take the three of us for a ride in his Bajaj scooter. He indulged us with roadside channa, icecream, chips, etc. which Maa normally did not allow us to have as kids. For dinner he used to cook all sorts of mixed daal or mixed vegetables with lots of Paanchpooran (an Indian spice mix):P. How we three sisters loved those meals! We cherish the memories of those days when he also took us out in his scooter to watch Independence Day, Republic Day, Viswakarma Puja at the Railway workshop, , Dashami, etc. I now realize, those were days of innocent joy and pure bliss. 😀
I dedicate this post to my Deuta and all the other Dads of the world. I just want to say to my Deuta that even though I am not home with you and Maa, there is not a single day that I do not think about you two.
For a girl, her Dad is very special as with this relationship she frames her first idea of a man. She looks after, nurture and mend what’s not right, and they love their “Daddy” the most in the world, he is the first guy they fall in love with and that beautiful love carries on for the rest of their lives.
For the three of us, Deuta, you can climb the highest mountain and protect us from all the monsters, and that’s because only “MY DADDY’S STRONGEST” 😀
I and my sisters are lucky and blessed to be your daughters. We pray to the Almighty that we are born as daughters to both you and Maa for many more lives.
I do not say it often, but I LOVE YOU ….