When he married her she was very young and he had a decent job. Both were not even graduates. Within 9 years of marriage they had 3 daughters. Birth of daughters, and when it’s three of them, is often a topic of discussion, sometimes pity & sometime ridicule too. But they accepted their gifts from God with gratefulness & listened to their hearts. Never did any of them ever regret that they were girls & carried out their responsibilities to the best of their abilities. And both of them had one common dream for the three of them – to educate them well & also to bring them up to be good human-beings. (more…)
When I saw this photo as the Write Tribe Wednesday Prompt (27 Nov- 04 Dec, 2013), the first thing that instantly came to my mind was this Sanskrit sloka which my Maa had taught me and my sisters when we were kids.
Om Asato Maa Sad-Gamaya |
Tamaso Maa Jyotir-Gamaya |
Mrtyor-Maa Amrtam Gamaya |
Om Shaantih Shaantih Shaantih || (more…)
India has reached it 67th year of independence. And I feel proud to be a citizen of this country. I have heard many people often saying that we should celebrate our independence day not only on this special day but everyday too. But I am of the opinion that dedicating a day to a cause and celebrating it on that particular day, every year, means quite a different thing. Doesn’t it feel nice to sit at our homes on this day, enjoying our freedom and talk about our nation and bring out our feelings of patriotism, which get suppressed in the hustle & bustle of our everyday lives? It is on this day that we stop to think about the sacrifices made by our forefathers, the freedom fighters, and reminisce the stories of our struggle for independence. It is also a day to feel proud of our nation, ponder about the journey it has made since this day in 1947. Having said that, it does feel sad when this day is celebrated, just because it should be and not because we feel it from our hearts. Often the speeches are given without meaning a word & they get erased from our memories the very next day we wake up. And the stories about our freedom struggle and the people behind it have become just part of the history lessons.
Today, as I go down the memory lanes, I remember those Independence Day celebrations I got to be a part of as a kid. Our Deuta (my father) used to take us 3 sisters, in his Bajaj scooter, to the Chowkidinghee field where the district administration organized the celebrations. Whitewashed bamboo barricades were built around the main activity area and we watched the parade and the other activities by leaning, & later trying to sit or rather hang, on these bamboo poles. Usually we used to get tired midway but Deuta made us watch the entire show right till its end when they distributed snacks. Later when we were headed home, he bought us balloons and septa badaam and once we reached home we settled down in front of the TV to watch the broadcast from Delhi. I miss those days.
On this day I feel our Motherland gives her every daughter & son a second chance, to undo all the wrongs of the past and make a fresh start. I am aware of all the good and the bad of my country and am still a proud Indian. In spite of the present situation, I am hopeful that one day India will emerge as the country which our freedom fighters dreamed of. In school, I remember reading a chapter in Social Studies about India. Today one particular phrase from that chapter comes to my mind – unity in diversity. As a child I learnt what it meant by-heart and was prepared to write it in my exams and even though I did not understand it fully at that age, the term intrigued me in some way. During my growing up years, I came across this term many times and each time a new meaning was added to it. Today I know what it means. And I am proud to be born in this land where there is unity in the wide diversity it has. They say, where there are vessels there will be sound and the same happens to this diversity. Because of the diversity in religion, language, caste, creed, etc. there had been some clamouring every now and then and each time, it had left us with a scar. But because of the unique unity, we survive each such clamour, fighting and recovering from it, marching our way forward.
The one thing in this country that needs an immediate reform is the political system, in fact it’s the political parties and its members. Some days I wonder, are our leaders actually elected democratically? And what is it that happens to them when they come to power? Every time I look forward for a leader to be the agent of change, they disappoint me by resorting to the same actions and strategies adopted by their predecessors. They all seem to be birds of the same flock. They are the one thing I am ashamed of in my country.
In spite of everything I am a proud Indian. I love my country with all its goodness and bad and feel lucky to have been born here. And I believe that rather than sitting in our comfy chairs & criticizing everything about the country we have the alternative of being the change we want to see. It is not necessary for us to undertake ground-breaking activities to do so. We just need to think about our actions – big or small – and the impact it would have on the people around us, the society, the state and the country. Being a doer rather than a criticizer is what the country needs now. Bringing out the goodness and fighting the bad is what is needed at this hour. And as always, I am hopeful that I and my fellow countrymen would soon rise and live up to the expectations of our Mother India.
(Note: This note was to be posted yesterday on the occasion of 67th Independence Day of India. However, due to internet connection issues, I could post it today)
Images: Google and FB page of Happily Unmarried (retail store)
“A father is someone that
Holds your hand at the fair
Makes sure you do what your mother says
Holds back your hair when you are sick
Brushes that hair when it is tangled because mother is too busy
Lets you eat ice cream for breakfast
But only when mother is away.
He walks you down the aisle
And tells u everything is gonna be Ok!”
A few days back, I watched the movie Father of the Bride (1991) once again. 😀 It is one of my all time favorite movies. The sweet bond between a father and his daughter is shown here in a perfect way, at least for me. They say, from the instant he lays eyes on her, he adores his daughter. Whoever she grows up to be, she is always that little girl in pigtails to him….. daddy’s lil’ girl. 🙂
When a child is born, a father is born. A mother is born, too of course, but at least for her it’s a gradual process. Body and soul, she has nine months to get used to what’s happening. She becomes what’s happening. But for even the best-prepared father, it happens all at once. On the other side of a plate-glass window, a nurse is holding up something roughly the size of a loaf of bread for him to see for the first time.
– Frederick Buechner in Whistling in the Dark
My Deuta (Dad) is a quiet man. He prefers to carry out his duties silently and all by himself, to the extent possible. He loves helping and cares for others, especially us and our extended family. Even though he never says it aloud, we know that he expects the same kind of care and love. Raising 3 daughters and giving them Convent (expensive) education, in the meager salary of a state government employee had never been easy for him, marriages and other festivities aside. But he never failed us. He used to tell us, “You cannot expect everything to be at your foot the moment you ask for it. You have to wait and you might as well get it”. This has made us value things we get and that everything, be it a piece of new eraser or a pair of new shoes, has a value. He always gave us practical lessons on life and always taught us the importance of family ties. From our early days of childhood, he made it clear to us that he cannot run around for every small thing for each one of us and so we should learn to do most of our work ourselves. When many of our friends used to be dropped at tuition classes, etc. by their dads or moms, I and my sisters rode cycles. Those were his early lessons on life and on being independent women. And this is helping me today to face the big bad world with courage & confidence.
Deuta has limitless faith in God and believes in Karma, that what goes around comes around. Even during our hard times, he never lost his faith on the Almighty. For him, every problem has a solution.
In our family, we do not indulge in openly displaying our affection towards each other. But now, with an empty nest, things have changed for both Maa and Deuta. Deuta does not talk much to us over phone, except the important things. But then he pesters Maa to call us if we don’t call them. 😛 Normally it’s the mothers who take up the job of worrying, but in our case it is our Deuta as well!!
I remember those days when Maa used to be not home, either visiting someone at our ancestral home or her own parents. Those were our days of indulgence. Deuta used to take the three of us for a ride in his Bajaj scooter. He indulged us with roadside channa, icecream, chips, etc. which Maa normally did not allow us to have as kids. For dinner he used to cook all sorts of mixed daal or mixed vegetables with lots of Paanchpooran (an Indian spice mix):P. How we three sisters loved those meals! We cherish the memories of those days when he also took us out in his scooter to watch Independence Day, Republic Day, Viswakarma Puja at the Railway workshop, , Dashami, etc. I now realize, those were days of innocent joy and pure bliss. 😀
I dedicate this post to my Deuta and all the other Dads of the world. I just want to say to my Deuta that even though I am not home with you and Maa, there is not a single day that I do not think about you two.
For a girl, her Dad is very special as with this relationship she frames her first idea of a man. She looks after, nurture and mend what’s not right, and they love their “Daddy” the most in the world, he is the first guy they fall in love with and that beautiful love carries on for the rest of their lives.
For the three of us, Deuta, you can climb the highest mountain and protect us from all the monsters, and that’s because only “MY DADDY’S STRONGEST” 😀
I and my sisters are lucky and blessed to be your daughters. We pray to the Almighty that we are born as daughters to both you and Maa for many more lives.
I do not say it often, but I LOVE YOU ….